You may have decided to try online dating, and discovered the poor result you’re getting. You went through the ridiculous long process of creating a profile. Possibly another hour answering their stupid questionnaire. Then after all that, all the messages you have sent out, you don’t get any replies. Don’t feel there is something wrong with you. Learn how to write an online profile.
You have to go through vigorous nonsense to sign up. Then after all that, it seems all your messages are ignored. First off, you have to understand that ALL dating sites are based on women. There are more men on these sites than women.
This decreases your chances to get a response. Women’s mailboxes are all blown up to the max. You quickly realize that the decision of a match is the woman’s choice. This means you have to do something to stand out or you don’t really exist.
You’re Not On A Level Playing Field
One thing men need to know about online dating that reduces every man’s chances of success. There are more men per dating sites than there are women. Some statistics show 73 to 27, others say 55% to 45%.
eHarmony actually has a more even match than most. However, you will still find it more common that other sites have more men. Usually, a larger number of younger men and a good number of older women. So, the gender and age matching doesn’t create a level playing field. Should age be an issue, well that is a whole other topic?
Keep this in mind next time you see that young beautiful Jessica Alba look-alike. You and thousands of other men have seen here. This means your message is lost amongst thousands. So many, that there is no way she can read them all.
Did She See My Message?
Another thing that lessens men’s chances. Women get hundreds of messages every day from horny guys. These guys think saying “What’s Up” is going to get them a attention. So, women have many messages to go through and is easy for them to overlook and miss yours.
As you can see, men are already at a disadvantage when they first sign up to a dating site. Keep this in mind before beating yourself up. This is key to why you need to know how to write an online dating profile.
Think About The Age Difference
Addressing the age thing a little. Let’s say you’re in your 50’s, and you see the hottest and cutest 21-year-old. Granted, you may still feel like you are in your 20’s. I am sure you could probably show here some things in the bedroom. But let’s look at it from her perspective.
You are a grody old man to her. She may like older men; she may have mentioned that in her profile. But what is actually an older man to her? I have found this usually means someone not exceeding 42. Chances are she is not going to respond to your message.
Many guys get on these sites looking for the now fix. However, women have this subconscious thought about long term. Would they want to marry someone they will be burying in 15 to 20 years? There is the gross thought of them dating a man as old as their father.
This mindset also works the other way as well. A guy in his 30’s or 40’s, is most likely not going to looking for women in her 60’s. So, age can be a factor, so you should think about it before reaching out to a woman on a dating site.
The Sites You Need To Avoid
There are sites that are just plain stupid, ridiculous and are frauds. There is a rash of sites, all with different names but with all the same layout and format. When you look at them closely, they all have the same girls. These sites are the ones that mostly offer guaranteed sex and are filled with naked women on them. This has scam written all over it and should be avoided, think of it this way.
This is the same as email ads or sites that promise big riches. They tell you that you can be making 7 figures in less than a week. You know that those are frauds. So, treat these cheesy dating sites the same. These scam sites are designed to collect your email addresses. They are just trying to take advantage of your vulnerability. Which is the desire to find a date.
Let’s Start Looking Into How To Write An Online Dating Profile
What can you do to improve your online dating success? First, you have to realize anytime you put yourself out there to get anything. You have to learn marketing. Don’t feel or think that you have to change who you are and be someone you aren’t. You never want to do that, you just need to market yourself, market your best qualities.
Some people are just natural about being charismatic. To have the ability to light a room when they walk in it. More people than not, often keep many things about themselves reserved and hidden. This means, the way you act in person is just as important is how you act online.
Your Personality Comes Out Even Unseen
Did you know that when talking on the phone, the person on the other end can pick up what mood you are in based off you if you are smiling or not? Same goes to chatting on a dating site, if you are already skeptical or just not putting in a positive effort on trying to get a date, you will come across that way and that will destroy your chances quickly.
Our feelings and attitude shine through keyboards and vocally. You have to be a pretty good actor to hide your feelings when talking to someone. If not, they will be able to detect your tone.
Wonder Why The Jerks Get The Girls?
Ever noticed that the women always seem to fall for a bad boy? It’s always some jerk that you know is a piece of crap. Leaves you wondering how this “low-life” got such a hot and great girl. Well, these types of guys do it because, “THEY DON’T CARE”. Getting women is a fun time game to them.
Women like to be challenged and like excitement. So, when you come up apologizing because you are asking them out. Ding-ding-ding, you are boring, too nice, not a challenge or fun, you are friend zoned. Of course, you don’t want to be that player guy. However, there is a lesson to learn here. That “I don’t care” personality, is what you need to put into your profile.
This doesn’t mean you act like you can care less. What you do is don’t come across needy. You can’t write a profile presenting yourself pathetic. Like this dating attempt is the last straw before suicide. No one wants to take on someone else’s life. They want to possibly share a life with someone. Come across fun and you were just stopping by to check it out.
Your Ugly Mug Shot
Of course, every dating site wants your ugly mug posted beside your biography. This is important as well as your extra pictures. The (Photo Gallery) you place on your profile. This is really crucial on how to write an online profile. You will want to put some serious thought into this profile picture. It might be a great idea to get a photographer to take it.
Don’t use a picture of you without your shirt. Even if you have the best body since Hercules, this turns women off. Another tip is, make sure that your pictures don’t include your messy housekeeping in the background.
Women notice and even look for things like this. So, if you are remodeling your house and have Sheetrock ripped off the walls down to the studs, don’t use this room for your selfie. You can use a picture of you remodeling your house. Just ensure it is captioned you do that sort of stuff. This can turn on some women, the like men good with their hands. However, do not use these kinds of photos for your main profile picture.
Your goal for your main profile photo is to offer a presence of fun but trustworthy. I wouldn’t make it look like you are a youth group pastor. The best thing you could do to get the best idea. Go look at magazines or clothing ads for men. Look at the facial expressions and body language. These guys know how to market themselves.
Remember how I mentioned earlier, your mood can be detected even on the other end of a phone? Well, this really applies to your picture. So, using your picture you have from your work badge or an arrest report really won’t work.
First impressions, this is the first thing women look at. Way before reading anything about you. You want to be in a great mood, be positive, smiling and yet looking like you don’t have a care. Your picture needs to say, “I am inviting you on the best adventure of your life.”
Your Other Pictures – Your Photo Gallery
Having a picture of you with other people having fun is a great one. This makes you look exciting and interesting. However, don’t post a picture that has so many people in the shot, they can tell which one you are.
Again, a picture with no shirt is bad. Unless, it is of you out on your boat or at the beach. Then you are showing you do things that are interesting. Pictures of yourself doing what you like, showing off your passions, how you enjoy life are the best.
Animals And Kid Pictures
Want to know how to write an online profile that works? Animals and kids, just don’t do it!! A picture with you loving on your animal is great and can get you positive results. However, posting pictures of just your animal is just not going to do it. When it comes to your kids, you need to use some commonsense here. Do you really want to post pictures of your kids on a dating site?
Doing so on Facebook is one thing, you have control who sees those. However, on a dating site, you do not know who you are exposing your kids to. You really do not know who is on the other end of that keyboard. Nothing wrong about being proud of your children. But it is also your job to protect them and keep them out of your dating life.
Profiles where half the pictures are solo shots of your animals or kids are horrible. After all, no one is wanting to take your dog or child out on a date. Those kinds of pictures are show after you get to go out on the date.
Look At Other Men’s Profiles First
Go look at other guy’s profiles. Take notes on ones that seem interesting and the mistakes you find. This will help you compile a better profile. If you find other men’s profiles boring, you know the women will too.
You can spot the one’s where they just brag. Or the guys that are just full of it in general. Look for what you are sure are lies or things that don’t add up. Then look for things that seem true and how it is structured.
Just take the best ideas from all the good profiles to compile your own. Notice the way the type and how they structure their sentences. Especially take note of their pictures..
Show That You Have Passion – Show You Like Yourself And Your Life
Saying Hi and your name and listing your favorite things can be boring to a woman. For example: Instead of saying, “Hi, my name is Harry, I am a janitor, I sweep floors at a school.” You could write it like: “Hey, my name is Harold, my friends call me Harry. I am in the facilities depart at the university. Working at the university is so cool, the building is full of mysteries.”
You just turned your name and a mundane job into something more interesting. You just need to be creative when writing about yourself. You may hate your job, but don’t write it that way. Show you have passion for the things you do. If you ride a motorcycle, talk about the things you love about it. Perhaps you like reading or watching mysteries, talk about it.
When you are done, go back and read what you wrote. If you find it boring or you are not getting out of it what you want. Have someone else read it and see what they think. If you come across that you hate your job and your life. Why would anyone want to get to know you?
Show You Are Worthwhile
You don’t want to write a novel. If the length of what a girl has to read is too long, they will move on to the next. However, you do want to make mention your dreams, goals or places you want to go. Write a little of where you see yourself in the future. The point is, let them know you are going somewhere in your life. You do offer a future and not some bum living with their mom.
Avoid Negative Topics
Talk about things in your life that are funny, upbeat and positive. Telling everyone that your significant other died in a horrible car wreck. And or it was a choice of committing suicide or getting on this dating site. Chances are, you will not be getting a date anytime soon. Trying to start a relationship out of pity is doomed for failure. Keep it fun, positive and a bit entertaining. Try and show you are not taking it so seriously. You are there to meet new people and have a nice time, not look for group therapy.
How To Get Her To Read Your Message
The proper way to write an online dating profile is to be the most interesting guy there. When sending a girl a message, you need to show her that you can be fun. That you can be a challenge and unique. You do this by showing her your best attributes. If you are that funny guy when you are out with your buddies, be funny with her.
Don’t ask her how it’s going or why she is on the dating site. Most women on dating sites get hundreds of messages daily. Most of them read like, “Hi”, “How Are You”, “Your Hot” and they have no use for that. The trick is, don’t be so serious or act like she is the only woman on the dating site to message.
You have to write something completely different, a headline that will cause her to read your message. Remember, she has hundreds to scan, she is only looking at the subject line. Write something like, “I think I am the one that hit your car in the parking lot last week”. She will probably open your message.
Your Message Length And Message Itself
Women want you to make an effort in a message. However, they are also not looking for a 50-paragraph mini-novel. So, you need to think about something to say that is unique and something that is going to interest them. Write a great opening line. Keep the length long enough to show she is worth some words, but short enough she will actually read it. .
You may write a message like, “Hey, I need a good driver for my getaway car, cut you in 50/50, are you in?” You can base funny lines like this off of things they revealed about themselves in their profiles.
Keep it short enough for them to read, long enough for them to know you are interested. Always read their profile enough to be able to make references to things they said. This shows you were looking at more than just their picture.
Let’s list out the key things you need to do to write an online dating profile.
- Before you start at any of this, approach it with a positive and optimistic outlook
- Take time and thought into creating your pictures
- Write a great profile that is unique and actually markets your best qualities
- Send unique messages that stand you out from the rest, that say you’re fun to talk with
I strongly suggest, before going through all the effort to get an online date. Ask yourself, are you actually ready to date? Some men think they are when they aren’t.
Of course, there is no guarantee that you will get every woman you message to message you. However, if you follow these suggestions above, you should see an increase of interest in your dating profile. As with anything, you will need to practice, tweak and make changes along the way.
I learned most of the above from a few reputable dating coaches. The advice turned my online dating activity around. I used to never get replies and rarely would ever get a message sent to me. I followed these guidelines and everything improved.
There is an eBook from one of the dating coaches that really helped my success along faster. It is of a flow chart that shows exactly how the attraction process works. I followed it while writing my dating profile and it turned my numbers around. I was going to getting maybe one response a week to getting several a day.
If you want faster results and some real advice from a professional, check out this eBook below. You won’t regret it, kind of clears things up.
FREE Play-By-Play Attraction Guide
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